It’s an age-old question girls have asked themselves for centuries: Is there a non-creepy way for men to approach women they don’t know?
Well, ladies and gentlemen, I finally have the answer. And it is a resounding YES!
How do I know this? I’ve seen it. More than that, I’ve experienced it. And I have a witness. (Please see Erin for the collaborating story.) Here’s how it all went down.
Scene: Erin (who is visiting me for the weekend!) and I went shopping, then decided to grab dinner at this falafel place she had been apparently fantasizing about. We choose seats near the front window so we can people watch as we eat. Some crazy man starts waving at us from outside, but we ignore him. A man behind us (let’s call him Darren, he’s about 30-35) says, “Looks like you girls have a fan!” Over my shoulder, I say something to the effect of, “Yeah, right??” We continue eating, the crazy man eventually leaves.
Here’s where it gets interesting.
Erin and I are just finishing eating, when Darren returns. Here’s the convo:
Darren – Excuse me, I don’t mean to interrupt your story, but do you guys know where the Highland bar is? It’s supposed to be somewhere near Union Square…I just want to make sure my sister knows what she’s talking about.
Me – Oh yeah, it’s about two blocks away. Walk until you see Forever 21, then turn right, and it will be on your left.
D– Oh great, thanks! (turns to Erin) I don’t mean to interrupt your story, but both of you girls are adorable, and — and this is just my opinion — your friend happens to be a little bit more adorable to me, just more my type. So if she’s single, and if it’s ok with you, I’m going to flirt with her a little bit. Is that ok?
Erin – (who is THRILLED at this point) Oh, it’s fine with me, but she does have a boyfriend.
D – (to me) You do?
Me – (apologetically) I do! We just had our six month anniversary!
D – Aw well that’s too bad. (moves toward the door) Well, I don’t really believe you, but you two have a good night.
Me – I mean it! I have a picture on my phone I can show you.
D – (laughs) Nah, it’s ok. (goes to leave, pauses, turns back) I just have to ask, are you in love?
Me – Yes.
D – (grabs chest dramatically) Aw, you’re breaking my heart! All right, well have a good night you two!
Erin and I were BLOWN AWAY with this A-level performance. Erin’s response?
“I feel bad because I wanted to reward him with you!”
But the point is, a non-creepy pickup is possible. He even won over the friend he wasn’t hitting on! It was amazing!
Unfortunately, I have negatively reinforced this behavior by turning him down. I’m hoping this blog post will make up for that fact by spreading the news of the right way to hit on some one. Pay attention, men of the world.