Lesson Learned

I do this occasional thing where I’ll tweet the random terms people enter in search engines that bring them to my blog. I think it’s really interesting/hilarious to see not only what people are looking for, but also to see what Old Man Internets thinks my blog is about. (Because, honestly, for the most part I have no idea.)

I recently tweeted about how a few people had found this little site by searching for “weird life lessons.”

Is there anything more poetic about that? I often have friends who ask me what I would write a book about (if I ever get that sort-of-joking-but-it-would-be-beyond-if-it-actually-happened book deal), and usually I just say something to the effect of, “How to awkwardly navigate life? Funny stories? I don’t know.”

But what I think I’ve been trying to say is, “Weird life lessons.”

Which leads me to my new idea. I think pretty much all of my posts can be summed up into a lesson learned.

Sometimes you have to let yourself off the hook.

It’s possible to make someone’s day with a slab of chicken and the leftover Dorito crumbs in the bag.

You never know when your personal rant will become a chorus.

I think it’s time to start making some of these implied lessons bolder statements. I LOVE bold statements.

For those of you new to the blog, this is not the first time I have incorporated life lessons into the blog. So from now on, they’re just going to be my sum-up point at the end of each post.

Bonus for you: If you don’t want to read the whole post, just skip to the last sentence! Lesson. Learned. (SEE WHAT I DID THERE???)

So let’s go!

Lesson learned: It’s good to have direction. (Even if all you’re really doing is copying yourself.)


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The 3 Most Annoying Things About Pinterest

You guys know I love Pinterest, right?

I mean, I bring it up an embarrassing amount. But fact is, it’s a genius idea, and I can literally wastespend hours on there.

But despite it’s usually wonderfulness, I have a few grievances to share.

1. I don’t want to see pictures of your grandchildren.

Listen. I get it. They’re the joy of your life. They light up your days. And I’m sure they are very sweet. But the fact is, I don’t want to see their sweet little faces sprinkled in between my pretty pictures.

I go to Pinterest to get inspired. That’s what it’s for. You’re turning it into a personal Facebook album. Except, by “personal” I mean “shared with the Internet.” That is the exact opposite of personal.

Pinterest is not an online album service. It’s an online pin board service. That you share with the seven million other people who are on there. Please don’t forget this.

2. No, it’s not adorable. It’s creepy as hell.

That Peter Pan shadow wall decal? That would give me nightmares. Those long-distance relationship pillows? That’s not romantic. That interrupts my REM cycle.

***Side note: I actually sent this idea to my friend Jaimie who writes a really funny/touching blog with her long-distance boyfriend and she did a post about it. Check it here.

What is the deal with people thinking weird things are awesome? Or “sweet”? Nope. Not sweet. NOT SWEET.

3. I forgot to change the caption…and now I sound like an idiot.

So Pinterest allows (requires actually) that you write a brief caption under each image you pin. This is fine. IN THEORY.

The problem is, there are a lot of people out there who think…well…dumb thoughts. Lord knows I do. But the trouble comes when they put them into words. (See any dumb post I’ve ever written.)

In this case, people are putting their dumb thoughts into the captions. So they sound really ditzy. Or really…out of touch. With reality.

This would all be fine, except when I re-pin something, if I forget to change the caption, it makes it look like I said that dumb thing.

I say enough dumb things on my own, thank you very much. I don’t need your dumbness gumming up the works.

So there you have it. The three most annoying things about Pinterest.

Does this mean I’m going to stop pinning? NEVER. I just needed to get that out of my system.


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Party bloggin’ in the house tonight

So I check my blog stats fairly often. Not often enough to be considered obsessed, but often enough that I can probably give you a pretty accurate ball park of where the numbers are at any given time during the day.

On one hand, I just like little charts and graphs and seeing where everyone is coming from. On the other, it’s just nice to know that there are actually people reading this nonsense.

But even though my stat guesses are usually pretty accurate, for a while I was getting pleasantly surprised every morning at how many people had visited the night before. I would go to bed at around 2-something, and wake to well over 300.

What was the source behind this bizarre (yet pleasing) phenomenon? Today at lunch, my husband and I concluded it must be my West Coast readers.

Me: That makes sense.

Him: While we’re sleeping, they’re partying all night.

Me: Oh yeah?

Him: Yeah. Party blogging.

Me: And what exactly does party blogging look like?

And then he demonstrated (I guess pretend he’s looking at a computer screen ha):
image

image

God love that man.

So question to all you party bloggin’ West Coasters: When are you reading my blog? Is it after 11 EST?