Glass case if emoticons

I have mixed feelings about emoticons. By all counts, I should hate them. I hate “text speak” for the most part, and generally only use it ironically.

But emotions…I’ll be damned if they haven’t winked their way into my grammatically correct heart.

And so, here it is; my totally unprovoked defense of the emoticon.

I think, like most things I come to love over time, it started as a joke. When I used a winky face, it was as if I was also winking at the audience, letting them know I was in on the gag.

Like, LOLZ OMG I’m totes winking at you grrrl, LYLAS!!!!!!1111oneone ;-);-);-)

But somewhere along the line, I stopped being able to claim sarcasm. My frowny face meant I was frowning. My smiley face represented my own happiness.

The tables had turned, and like any other addiction, there was no going back.

But you know what? I’m okay with it, and here’s why: Writers, email users, and online chatters alike have long and oft complained that the biggest downfall of written communication is it’s lack of emotional context.

I say, “You’re an idiot.”

I could be insulting you. I could be using an inside joke my sister and I share, where we mean this in a loving sense. (You wouldn’t get it.) I could be teasing entirely.

But you don’t know because you can’t see my face.

So what does the internet go and do? It gives is another way. An arguably better way. Emoticons.

Suddenly, you don’t have to wonder if I’m joking or sincere. Suddenly, even if there are no words for what we’re talking about but I still want to be there for you, the frowny face becomes my expression of sympathy.

Is it perfect? No, and I’m in no way saying that it’s impossible to abuse the emoticon. But I’m not a believer in extremes, so I disagree with anyone who says they’re always stupid.

Those people are probably just a bunch of angry faces anyway. πŸ˜‰

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Working for the weekend

Well folks, it’s that time of year again. Which means my weekend starts tomorrow. Which means you’ll have to last three days without a post instead of the standard two. (Here’s where I’d normally make a self-deprecating “I know, you’re inconsolable” joke, but it occurs to me that I’ve done that a few times already. Suffice to say I realize this announcement doesn’t ruin your day.)

I recently explained to my friend Bryan that I have a policy about not posting on weekends. (Well, aside from the occasional Out of Context quote. You’ve gotta get that stuff down while it’s fresh.) He thought it was amusing, which I suppose it sort of is. After all, I’m not getting paid here. I don’t have deadlines, except the ones I impose on myself. I could start a “no posts on every day except Wednesday” policy if I really wanted to.

But I guess it never occurred to me that my policy was funny until then. I mean, I update my blog almost every week day. I have a pretty loyal following of readers (and even a few I don’t know! Progress!). And if I can be a Me Monster for a second, I break 200 views a day with a fair amount of regularity now. (300 is the goal for 2011. I’m looking at you, casual readership.)

So maybe the policy is silly. But you never know how things will turn out. And having set days I don’t blog reinforces the unspoken rule that I should write the other days.

I know, you’re all eternally grateful.

Swap & Meet

So, I’m pretty excited about this. As many of you know, I like to blog (durrr). I also like reading other people’s blogs and getting to know great bloggers. Which is why I found this idea so appealing.

Genius bloggers Sandy A La Mode and Much Love, Illy came up with the idea to for the Cold Hands, Warm Hearts swap. You can read the deets, but basically, once you send Sandy your info, she pairs you up with another blogger that can be anywhere else in the world. You get to know each other a bit, then send each other a care package containing some kind of gloves or mittens (mittens!!) and anything else you think that person might enjoy. One hundred bloggers are participating. So cool, right?

Well, today we got our partners! Mine is Emily from Today Tomorrow Thursday. And guys, she’s kind of awesome. I mean, I crocheted a couple of headbands, but she is crafty beyond belief. Plus she’s super into snail mail (a girl after my own heart), and her postcard art is also lovely. Talk about pressure to make my own packaging a masterpiece!

She has also totally motivated me to turn all of my blogroll members into pretty badges. Because who doesn’t need more prettiness in their life, amiright? (And I now have about 80 ideas for things I could do with baker’s twine…sigh. Wedding crafts.)

So I need to get the prettiest little package mailed out by December 1st. So excited to start!!

One dress two ways…or else

I don’t do a lot of fashion-related posts on here (you know, aside from when I’m whining about things I can’t afford or worrying that I look like an extra from Saved By The Bell). It’s not that I don’t know anything about the topic (I was voted Best Dressed my senior year of high school. Get it, meaningless paper certificate.), it’s just that in general I don’t have too much to say about it.

Unless, of course, fashion would somehow become intermingled with awkwardness, which I write about like it’s my JOB. (It’s not, I swear. It’s my job to write about this.)

We already know that some of my best ideas have been born out of desperation, so why should this be any different. To catch you up, I accidentally locked my keys in my apartment yesterday. (Enter reason number two of the only two bad things about living alone.) This has only happened one other time since moving to the new place, and that time my landlady was home and simply let me in. This time, however, I think I may have caught her having a torrid romance because she wasn’t home at 9 last night and apparently hasn’t been home since. (Scandal!)

Fortunately, I can shower/sleep at the Fiance’s parents’ house. Unfortunately, all my clothes are still in my apartment. Fortunately, he has a sister my age that I can borrow from. Unfortunately, she’s quite a bit skinner than I am so my options are limited.

Which leaves me with this sad truth: I’m wearing basically the same thing I did yesterday.

Before you get all hygiene police on me, let me explain. Yesterday I wore a navy dress, gray tights and heels, a lilac sweater, pearl necklace, and my hair in a ponytail. Today I’m wearing a navy dress, gray tights and heels, a silver necklace my future mother-in-law gave me last night, a white sweater (future sister-in-law’s), and a navy dress sash thing I found in their laundry room and fashioned into a belt. With my hair down. It’s a totally different look! (I explained this to the Fiance and he said, “Are you sure they’ll even recognize you?” He’s a funny one!)

I actually don’t know if anyone would notice if not for the shoes (and if I didn’t work in an office that is 99% fashion-conscious women), so I’m giving myself major sartorial props for this one.

Desperate times call for desperate outfits. Or at the very least, a spare key.

Your outfit is inappropriate

This will probably come as no surprise to those of you who know me in person, but I’m a chronic overdresser.

Part of it, I’m sure, has to do with the fact that due to my schedule, if I’m going anywhere that requires dressing up at any part of the day, I have to be dressed like that all day. Also, I hate changing more than twice in the same day. Also, I just prefer dresses and skirts to pants any day of the week.

For example, the Friday before I went camping, I wore camping clothes to work since I was leaving straight from there. “Camping clothes” are worn jeans, tennis shoes, and a nubby sweater. It was hardly flattering, and I didn’t feel like myself all day.

That being said, I also find it kind of hilarious to be overdressed for the most casual of activities.

This weekend, my friends Sam and Craig and I had about two hours to kill in between two activities that required suits and dresses (respectively). I suggested bowling (an inspired idea, if I do say so myself).

Could we have gone home to change first? Well sure, if we wanted to spend the two hours driving to our three respective homes, changing, then driving back to our homes to change back.

Even so, Sam was a little dubious.

“We’re going to bowl? In our suits?”

That’s exactly what we’re going to do.

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Yeah, Craig pushed up his suit jacket sleeves. I believe my exact response was, “Uh, yeah, that’s probably what’s holding you back…”

The highlight (besides, ahem, winning the first game and tying for first place with the average) was when the guy at the front desk looked us up and down and asked if we were coming from a “wedding or something.” (Cue me: “What if we were? You guys should bowl after my wedding.”)

And considering how well I bowled whilst overdressed, I may never bowl in pants again.

Things people search

So, besides keeping track of your blog stats, WordPress has some pretty nifty blog functions. For example, telling you what search terms people used to find your blog that day. Which, inevitably, leads to some hilarity.

So here you have it, folks! It’s not a comprehensive list, but these are my favorite terms people have used in the last year to find my blog. (Side note: You can try searching some of them, but to be honest, I have NO idea how people found my blog. It must be buried somewhere on page 27 of Google or something…anywho…) And just for fun, I linked a few to the posts I’m assuming came up in the search. Let’s begin!

robin scherbatsky haircut
nobody likes you when youre 23
teacher called student skank
sleep drooling
“skanky jean shorts”
“pantyhose and tennis shoes”
“skank susan in pantyhose”
“green gremlin emoticons for droid
rainbows and puppy dogs
huddle clap
“i love you man ridonkulous
penn station
“oh my gosh it’s gonna be an osh kosh night”
“embarrassed”
statistically inclined
“bandana around neck + hipster
country song dont judge me”
“headband earmuff crochetting
“is it totes mcgoats or totes magotes”

…sounds about right.